15. Examination of the Conscience

Examination ought to go before confession, but the examination ought to be consistent with the state of the soul. These two simple acts—or better yet, passive attitudes—fill us with a love for the beauty that He imparts. They that would perform it aright must lay themselves open before God, who will not neglect to enlighten them concerning the nature of their faults. But they must examine themselves in peace and tranquility, expecting to have the knowledge of their sins given them from God, rather than from their own scrutiny.

When we exert any strong effort to examine ourselves, we are readily mistaken: we believe the good to be evil and the evil to be good (Isaiah 5:20), and self-love easily deceives us. But when we expose ourselves before the all-seeing God, this divine Sun shows us even the minutest jots and tittles. Therefore we ought to abandon ourselves to God, both as to examination and confession.

As soon as the soul is advanced to this manner of prayer, God takes particular care to reprove it for all the faults it commits. This reproof comes immediately as a certain burning that rebukes it. Then God begins an inquiry, in which He does not suffer anything to escape: and then the soul has nothing to do but turn itself in all simplicity towards God and suffer the pain and correction that He inflicts.

Since examination on God’s part is continual, the soul can no longer examine itself. If it is faithful in resigning itself to God, it will be much better tried and searched into by His divine light than it can be by all its own anxieties. Experience will convince you that this is true.

As to confession, you must notice one thing—namely, that souls which walk in this way will be often surprised to find that when they begin to confess their sins to God, instead of sorrow and contrition, which they were wont to feel, a sweet and serene love seizes their heart. Those who are not acquainted with this matter would perhaps withdraw from it to perform an act of contrition, because they have heard that this is necessary—and so it is. But they do not perceive that they lose the true contrition, which is this inspired, intuitive love, infinitely greater than anything they could achieve of themselves. This love encompasses the other acts in one transcending act; and it does so far more perfectly than if they were separate acts with shifting moods. Therefore let them not trouble themselves by doing any other thing, when God acts so graciously in them and with them.

To hate sin in this manner is to hate it as God does. The purest love is that which God produces in the soul. Let it not therefore be eager to act, but let it remain such as it is, following in the wise man’s counsel: “Put your trust in God, and continue in rest in the place where He has set you.”

The soul will be amazed that it so easily forgets its defects; yet it ought not to be troubled at this, for two reasons: one is because this forgetfulness is a sign of its purification from the fault; and the excellency of this state consists, namely in forgetting all that concerns us, that we may remember God only.

The other reason is that God will not fail to reveal to the soul its greatest faults when it is necessary for it to make confession, because He makes the examination Himself; and the soul will see that in this way it shall better achieve its goal than by all its own endeavors.

This is not applicable to those earlier states where the soul, being yet in the active state, may and ought to use its care and diligence in performing all things according to the measure of its advancement. But let the souls that have reached this stage keep to what we have told them, and not change their simple exercises. Let them rather suffer God to act, and let them keep silence. God cannot be better welcomed than by God within