18. On Defects and Infirmities

Whenever we have fallen into any sin, or have at any time gone out of the way, we must immediately turn inward, since this default has led us away from God; and we ought as soon as possible to return to Him, and suffer patiently the regret which He works in us.

It is a matter of great importance not to be vexed or disturbed because of our defects, for this trouble or disquiet proceeds from secret pride, or from the love and esteem of our own excellence. We are uneasy when we realize what we are; but if we allow ourselves to be depressed or discouraged thereby, we are weakened so much the more, and the reflection we make upon our faults creates within us a peevishness or fretting that is worse than the fault itself. Trouble and disquiet only sink and entangle the soul the more, whereas a vigorous act of conversion to the Divine Presence within us, attended with a living faith and a humble confidence, will infallibly extinguish the temptation, dispel the darkness, and overcome the enemy. For, one that stands in God’s presence must hate sin, as God hates it.

A soul that is truly humble does not wonder at its infirmities; and the more miserable it sees itself, the more it surrenders itself to God and endeavors to keep close to Him, seeing the great need that it has for His Divine power to do this. God Himself has taught us this, saying, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you should go; I will guide you with My eye.” Psalm 32:8.